Change is the bane of human existence. The word alone can provoke the most latent fears and insecurities. Discomfort is not on our “to-feel” list and therefore anything that creates it must be “bad.” As humans we are quick to assign value to our world rather than experience it. What we fail to realize is that our world is always changing, whether we want it to or not. If life is always changing and we know that this is constant, what do we do in order to navigate through the waves that come crashing at us?

When the surf is up, try this….

~Work to maintain a positive outlook.
This can be tricky. It is hard to keep in mind that everything will be ok when you feel like you are treading in ten feet of water with hundred pound weights around your ankles. One way to help maintain a positive outlook is to find a mantra, or phrase, that serves to remind you of when you are starting to spiral into the abyss. In order for this to work, pick a phrase or word that holds a strong meaning to you. The phrase I find myself using the most is, “It is what it is.” This is my way of acknowledging that something in my life is changing, it is causing me stress, and life is ok because what I am feeling is natural.

~Instead of labeling your experience as bad or good, go with the flow.
WHAT!?!? Yes, I said it, go with the flow. Your flow that is. Have I confused you yet? What I mean by “going with your flow” is allowing yourself to experience life in a way that is raw and pure, living in a way that honors who you are. If you think about it, do you really know what the true outcome of something will be in the moment it is happening? Not really. Sometimes it is not until years later that someone will look back at an event and realize how it truly impacted them. If this is the case, how can you really judge whether or not an experience is bad or good? Leaving the value out while managing change reduces the intensity and makes you less likely to become stuck in hurricane Negativo.

~Don’t forget to cope.
Sounds simple huh? Not so much. We get so caught up in what is happening in our lives that we forget to breathe let alone cope with what is happening. We attempt to stuff our feelings away and keep moving through life as if nothing has happened. Although we think we are successfully avoiding our feelings we are actually acting them out. Nothing felt is forgotten in my book and even when we think we are doing a fantastic job of hiding our truth it always seems to find a way out. Explosive anger, over eating, addictions, these are just a few ways our feelings end up showing themselves. Don’t just sit there, do something. Find something that brings you comfort and relief; journal, paint, dance, kick box, Frisbee golf…it does not matter what you do; the point is to do something.

It is easy to fall into old patterns when stress is high and life feels chaotic. Being aware of how you think and feel about change can help you to navigate through it. Taking care of yourself along the way will also increase your ability to adapt to your new horizon. Life is change in motion, what direction are you going in?